When i was a lot younger, i believe that love is the goal for everything. If i were in a relationship, i would want the best out of it. In my head, the best relationship would mean that I would be close to that person all the time. I would sms on and on for when i sms it feels kind of fulfilling inside me. I was the person who have to experience love every single day. It was nice for a moment but it destroys the fundamental of a relationship. yeah i was that person.
For some reason those feelings were like a drug to me. If you don't have it, its like the feeling of withdrawing drugs inside you. Its like constantly in need of the person saying i love you every minute of the day. For when he is away doing something i would feel like he doesn't love me that much anymore. When he talks to other women its like he is betraying my love for him.
In the end when we were broken up, i hated myself more . I now have different views about love. I have cleared myself form being that person, in a sense i have become sober. Its like the "aha" moment for me. But i have to say that without those past drama i might not realise it sooner. So now when i see friends having the same symptoms i know how it feels. I know that he/she will need the drama to wake up.
i guess that is when you will know that it is time to grow up and stand up. i know now that relationship is build on trust and it is earned through a period of time. Skipping the time will serve no good.
For some reason those feelings were like a drug to me. If you don't have it, its like the feeling of withdrawing drugs inside you. Its like constantly in need of the person saying i love you every minute of the day. For when he is away doing something i would feel like he doesn't love me that much anymore. When he talks to other women its like he is betraying my love for him.
In the end when we were broken up, i hated myself more . I now have different views about love. I have cleared myself form being that person, in a sense i have become sober. Its like the "aha" moment for me. But i have to say that without those past drama i might not realise it sooner. So now when i see friends having the same symptoms i know how it feels. I know that he/she will need the drama to wake up.
i guess that is when you will know that it is time to grow up and stand up. i know now that relationship is build on trust and it is earned through a period of time. Skipping the time will serve no good.
being both intoxicated and detoxified are important for the human side in each of us. but as they say, the higher they are, the harder they fall.
ReplyDeletebut i always prefer a roller coaster to a merry go round.
is that wise or foolish?
life..that is life i guess... we can choose what we want to do about it but we must bear the consequences
ReplyDelete